It's a beautiful life!

One day at a time

I woke up this morning feeling drained from a night of wallowing in self-pity and who hasn’t been there before, right? I couldn’t figure out what all the fuss was about though. I was alive, healthy, well provided for and generally happy– but still I’ve been carrying this overwhelming feeling of despair all day so far.

So, I started to walk backwards in my mind… (refer to “Things I Learned from Sesame Street” whenever I get around to posting it).

Suddenly the disappointment from last night came over me like a disastrous repressed memory that was unwillingly recalled. Oh yes, there it was, perched at the front of my usually rational mind and begging for painful consideration. I remember that first there was glee at the prospect of attending the Michael Buble concert last night, followed by confusion after I had been very unreasonable with the person who I was supposed to go with (NB:he wasn’t exactly cooperative either), then disbelief that he didn’t pick me up to go to the performance, immediately followed by regret because I didn’t go and mostly because I had allowed myself (my pride) to cause grief to an underserving person and to chalk up another neglected opportunity.

Reality check:
I may have missed the performance, but Buble didn’t miss me being there.
I was nasty to a wonderful person and so I feel so stupid/sorry/sad.
It’s not as bad as I’m making it out to be – I could just work up the courage to call him and make sure he’s alright.
I’m not the only person that has occasional impaired judgement. (Gosh, I really hope I’m not!)

Ok, so now that I’ve established that I was feeling crappy for no other reason than because we had a “fight”, I just have to apologize to him and move forward. (Hey, I actually feel better now!)

Lessons learned:
Each day/opportunity is a blessing that we must choose to make the most of.
The well-being of my loved ones is critical to my own well-being.
I’m sure our friendship is sturdy enough to survive this.
Everybody makes mistakes and learning from them is one of those things that keeps my life interesting.

I am very sorry for what I did but it’s not beneficial to live in regret of what I’ve done in the past or to dread the dumb things that I will do in the future – it’s all about making the most of today. I received an e-mail with a precious reminder –“Each day is a gift, that why it’s called the present”

That works for me - I love presents!

posted by S.M. @ 5:55 pm